That is a great list of don'ts. We have to remember it is a transaction. first and foremost.

Gary Waters -Real estate agent Viera Suntree Melbourne and Rockledge FL (Bucci Realty www.moving2brevard.com)  You are so totally correct.  It is a business deal.

Thank you for the blog.  It is true too many emotions in the transaction if it is not what the buyer wants go on to the next one.  If the seller does not want the offer go on to the next one.  Never forget to advise your client on the conditions of the market.

Jim-  I agree whole heartedly!  We need to remember that we are there to advise a client, not to control a client.  We all need to remember the key words you used- professional manner. 

Jim..these are excellent points...negotiations can be done much better without agents being personally involved.we have a fiduciary relationship not a personal..

HelpfulHannah

Elite Home Sales Team Keller Wms. Realty  You are welcome.  Objectivity is what really matters. 

Jen Olson (First Weber Group Realtors)   I like that .  "Advise not control!"  Emotions cloud our judgement!

Hannah Williams (Re/Max affiliates NE)  You said it well, "...we have a fiduciary relationship not a personal!"

Hi Jim...Great Post, sounds like a lead into your next post, with a list of all the things agents should do :O))

Victoria Oak Bay Realtor Fred Carver 250-598-2963 for Victoria Oak Bay Homes (Re/Max Camosun Oak Bay & Surrounding Area Real Estate)  Fred, you give me too much credit, but thanks for the idea!

Nice post and definitely great reminders.  It is easier to negotiate when you have your business hat on...not personal.

Lisa Matykiewicz (United Brokers Group)  I totally agree.  In this market many agents are trying to play "Social worker!"  Instead what is occuring is the homes are not selling.

Great list, advice and reminders!  When you're joined at the hip with your clients for months, it can be challenging to keep the balance between personal and professional conduct. 

Ok Jim I have to ask. Why do you edit the comments and insert a link? I'm presuming SEO? Anyhooo business is just that and we need to understand how to separate emotions from it.

Jim -

Great point and very good post.  You can drive yourself (and others) crazy by becoming emotionally involved.

Terri Adams-Scott, Realtor, Walnut Creek CA Real Estate (J. Rockcliff REALTORS)  You raise a great point. Realtors claim to be professionals but are they?  Does your Doctor, CPA, or lawyer invite you out to lunch or discuss details of their personal life with you?  So why do we?

Laura Jefferson (Acquire Real Estate)  I agree!  BTW...I just like to make sure I respond to everyone individually!

Joel Prince, Hixson/Soddy Real Estate Broker (The Principle Group, Inc)  Like Jack Webb on Dragent, we need to just stick with the facts.

Jim so much good advice there I had to read it a couple more times, thanks.

Jim,

  Excellent points, had a listing agent go postal on me that my clients still talk about.. I remained calm and approached the agent from a different angle. I like you bullet points and will add this to my bookmarks for future reference. 

Jim:

As always, great post.  Thanks for your thoughts.

 

www.JorgeSanchezRealestate.com

 

Jim, 

Awesome post.  You are completely right.  It's critical to stay objective and do your role to the best of your ability.  It works out for all involved much better.  Thanks for the reminder.

All the best, Michelle

John Walters (Licensed in Louisiana U.S.A.) (Slidell, Pearl River, Lacombe)  John, we've all been there.  I had to just sit back and tell it like it is.

Katharine Carey, Agent Carey- Realtor® (eXp Realty)  It really has nothing to do with the listing agent, but that is exactly what happens when they view it as their own.

Jorge Sanchez (Remax Integrity)  You are more than welcome.

Michelle Francis, Atlanta GA (Tim Francis Realty)  I sometimes wonder if brokers have meetings with their agents and explain this to them.

Hi Jim, I'm using this at sales meeting tomorrow.  As agents, we need to remain neutral.  Thanks for the great post.

Kay Van Kampen, CDPE, Broker, Springfield Missouri Real Estate (RE/MAX Solutions)  I hope it helps.  As an industry we really need to get the word out!

Jim, Thanks so much for putting this post out there. I had sometimes put a little extra heart and soul in my transactions when I first started in the biz. I now try to maintain a little objectivity and put my shoes in the other agent's shoes. It takes a meeting of the minds to make things work. 

Great post!!! 

Good'un!  maybe add "never allow personal financials to enter into the decision making process"...

Thanks Jim.  Since the core of our business is helping people - its hard sometimes to stay detached and focus on the business we've been hired to conduct.

Jim,

Thanks for a great post.  There's really nothing I can add to it.

Tom

Sandy Aichner ~ Broker REALTOR® www.SandyIsYourAgent.com (RE/MAX Executive Realty)  Sandy, you are more than welcome. We all did the same thing.

Sue Keenan (RE/MAX Advantage)  I am glad you enjoyed!

Jim, this is the best description of Real Estate 101 that I've read in a long time.  Thank you.  We can all tend to get carried away as we try to serve our customers.  The best results occur when we help everyone to stay "between the lines" of sanity - keep the emotions under control and keep it respectful and professional.   Great post, thanks.

Sometimes you just have to shut up and wear beige.  Posturing and bullying, weeping and wailing doesn't help move the transaction forward.   Great post as usual Jim.  You would be a pleasure to work with.

Jeff Wilmoth (HomeStar Financial Corporation)  I like that!

It is always amazing to me that most agents DO seem to get emotional, controling and demanding. Well, as my grandmother used to say "you can get more bees with honey than with vinegar". I always ask myself when a tense situation comes up "how would I like person to respond to me in this situation?"

great post!

Jeanne Dufort (Prudential Parkway Realty)  The moment we become emotionally involved in those situations, we cease to be of assistance.  We are no longer thinking business like.

I totally agree with this article, it's a great post! However, I think it should be addressed when agents do act professional and everything in favor of their client but for some reason their client thinks the agent is out to screw them and eventually screws the agent. I think a lot of agents can agree that they have this stereotype of being unethical, when in fact the agent is supposed to be very ethical and have a duty to their client. A lot of clients don't understand this and I think because the ups and downs of the real estate market they don't trust Real Estate Agent. Hopefully, more and more people will trust the agents that are still in business and have held their head high through this terrible market. I purchased www.itsyoursale.com in 2002, and I'm still working on it daily and it's 2010. You know you look back and you realize "wow" a lot of ups and downs but at least I'm thankful for the experiences.

Tom Branch, Broker, CDPE, SFR (RE/MAX Dallas Suburbs)  I am glad you enjoyed!

I agree that this is one of the bigger mistakes agents make.  If we can't be emotionally detached, how can we ask our client to be?  Remember, we're there ONLY because they want a professional, not a friend.

Thanks Jim.  I rarely run into an agent who acts from an emotional base vs. a professional one.  I recently encountered an attorney representing the seller who was definitely working from an emotional standpoint vs. a professional one which was very interesting. 

The person who's behavior is not professional gains no ground in negotiations and does their client more harm than good.  He/She who loses their cool first also loses control of the transaction.

Teri Eno, Melbourne FL Homes (RE/MAX Alternative, Melbourne FL)  I guess it does not matter how long we are in business, we all have our limitations.  We must keep our heads screwed on right and keep the deals moving forward.

Outstanding post!  There is so much emotion inherent in a residential real estate transaction that it takes a conscientious effort to put that emotion aside.  We are obliged to act as professionals, and that professionalism can easily be compromised when we let our emotions override our better judgment.  Very well written-- thank you!

Excellent post, Jim!  I'm always advising my agents when they come to me with a negotiation problem that they are not the principle, and they do not make the decisions.  The job of an agent is to give their client all of their options and then advise them on what course to take, not make the decision for them.  The best negotiation is a win-win negotiation.  All the bulldog, posturing agents are only making life more difficult for their clients.  After a price negotiation you still have to go through repairs.  What if the closing needs to be delayed by one party?  Don't make the buyer/seller your enemy.  Everything works better when we work together! 

Reasons we should refer family members to other agents...

Alyce Martin in Albuquerque - THE Place To Be! (The Realty Group, LLC)  Hey Alyce, long time no see!  Maybe yes, and maybe no.  Sometimes, I could just lose it.  Cooler heads prevail, and I am a redhead by nature.  My wife Ellen has a better temperament to deal with folks than myself.

What praise can I give you that hasn't already been said...how about "Great Post Jim" :)  If only we wern't wired with emotions ..think of how many deals we would have closed!

Lane Mabray (RE/MAX Westside Realtors)  A lot of life truly is the 'Golden rule!"  We really must treat others, like we would like to be treated ourselves.

terrible post - lol - j/k wanted to be different

Jim this is a great reminder and I am going to print it and keep it where I can see it at all times.  Our emotions sometimes do or can get in the way of successful negotiations.  Your last paragraph and your bullet list are powerful reminders.  Thank you.

mark adamczyk -  I agree, we must learn from those experiences, and do the right thing.

Well said!

Jim Pirkle (Harvest Realty LLC)  Exactly!

That is some good advice...it's a jungle out there with lot's of different animals...acting professional unfortunately is not always priority with some species.

Catherine Condon (Integrity Residential Brokerage)  Well, over the years I've come to learn that is is the way a lot of agents conduct their business.  It is their 'modus operendi' or 'MO!'  (Their way of operating) and I guess they were never told it is very counterproductive.  It is strange to hear of an attorney losing objectivity.

Two of the points made in the post and the comments following have to do with maintaining emotional control, and with the need for agents to keep balance between themselves and their principals vis a vis setting prices, accepting and rejecting offers, etc.  Both are subjects in the book Zen and the Art of Negotiation I recently published.  It is available on Amazon, BarnesAndNoble.com, and elsewhere.

I speak directly on how to keep your emotions under control, using the teachings of Zen. I also have a chapter on the how-to of the relationship between agent and principal.

 

Chuck Gollay (Exit Realty Paramount)  I agree.  These are tough times, and one in which a good agent knows they may not be able to pull the deal off.  We must know our own limitations, and not try to achieve the impossible.

Thanks for the list.  I never get emotionally attached to any deal.  No matter how large the commission.  I am usually the level head for my client as a buyers agent.  I have recommend to clients whether i think a property is overpriced or a really great deal.  They value my opinion.  I have told client wait a few months the price will come down and this was in the height of the RE boom.  I would also advise them if you lose out because you waited then this deal wasn't for you.

 

You have 2 options offer the owner the price you think its actually worth now.  Or wait a few months and they will lower the price sometimes even less than you were going to actually offer.  So don't get emotionally attached or at least don't let the seller know this and it will always work out in the end.

Jim,

I like the list of 20--all great info to remember!  Emotional, chip-on-their-shoulder realtors rub off on their clients...making them anxious.  Fortunately, I haven't had to work with many!!

Angie Boule' (Rivers Trail Realty) Amen.  Even when I sell my own property, I always ask other agents for their opinions before I list.  The reason is, that I have a hard time emotionally detaching.

I still remember the time an agent was screaming into the phone because my seller counter offered her buyers low ball offer. Not sure if that agent was under stress for some other reason or having a bad day, or what, but she was negotiating on behalf of her son's friend. Every time I hear or see her name, that moment is instantly recalled. lol

I have to be honest, I stopped reading after I got to the highlighted comment  "My own thoughts are if the home is that bad, why did you write an offer on it?"

Isn't that the whole purpose of not being emotional about real estate?  Present your client's offer because it is their offer, not yours?

Sorry if this is clarified somewhere else.  But I got dizzy understanding the logic.

Anthony Giglio (RE/MAX Leading Edge)  I agree, but emotions always do come first.  However it is our intellect that must rule.

opinion - Glad you enjoyed.

Charita Cadenhead (Bham WIiRE Realty, LLC (You Got Options!))  You are more than welcome.

Although I agree with you on the points you make, I find if you are human it is impossible not to get emotionally attached in some respect. When you have clents with terminal cancer or they are losing their home to foreclosure, or the senior who must work bagging groceries to try to pay their mortgage and you are working with these people for any length of time you must be emotionally involved in some fashion. That is part of caring for people.

I was a health care professional for almost twenty years and in school and the constant training sessions we had they would always tell you not to be emotionally attached, yet that is impossible. Ask someone who works in a hospice whether they become emotionally attached to their patients. They do, but they control their emotions as a professional and then go and move on to do what is right. For me whether it was a patient who died and the sorrow their family felt, or delivering a baby there was the emotional element. When I went to disasters as a Critical Incident Stress Debriefer I became emotionally attached. You are not human if you do not. People are not numbers.

The secret is when you do get emotionally attached you still have to be professional, whether in medicine or Real Estate. I find the folks in medicine or Real Estate who do not get emotionally attached are those that act like robots. It is simply a matter of how you handle the emotional attachment, as a professional or someone whose emotions get in the way.

I can become emotionally attached to my client, but I must be able to look at the deal in professional terms and stay professional in dealing with the offer or contract.

I think as you pointed out so well is not to treat the home or deal like it is your own.

And of course we have all run into agents who do take low offers or the deal as their own and cannot separate their feelings from the deal. They are most likely better off not being in a profession that so much requires dealing with people and all their issues. We are in a business that must listen to why these folks are selling or buying and you cannot listen to some of the stories without becoming emotionally attached.

Great post!

Stephaniewebb034@comcast.net  I am glad you enjoyed.

Valerie Sagheddu ~Home Staging Professional, Poconos, PA (Apostle Art Home Staging & Design)  It is a jungle out there.

Thanks for the blog.   This will be what I use for discussion in our staff meeting today!    Oh yes,  I couldn't agree more.

Great post.  I prep my sellers from the listing appointment forward about trying not to take offers personally.  I remind them about how long it takes to write an offer and that the buyer must be interested because they took the time to write it up.  Then I suggest sitting down and looking at the whole offer and coming up with something they (the sellers) can live with. 

When working with buyers, I explain the difference between a low offer and a lowball offer and the risks associated with said offers.  I tell them I will write what ever offer they want, but that they risk having the seller not dealing with them at all.  I have had a seller tell a buyer to go away before after repeated negotiations that were thousands of dollars apart.

I try to be as professional as I can when dealing with other agents, but sometimes there tone & words send me over the edge! (ok only 2x last year as a matter of fact) lol  But it worked out both times.  I just had to keep my teeth clinched the entire deal because the agents were also threatening when presenting their buyers repair requests.  But that is a post for another day!

Thanks for the well thought out advice.

Phil Marcus  Thank you for your comments.

Jim, you've written a great reminder, and I love your bullet point list.

Catalyst International Realty  Sometimes, it is very hard to detach.  Selling a home where one spouse is terminally ill could was the most draining deal I've ever been involved with.  It was a deal where it was impossible to disconnect your head from the heart.

Sonja Patterson REALTOR for Cypress, Houston, Katy, TX (RE/MAX Realty Center)  Stick around for a while, there are a lot of them.

Great post, it is my job to remain professional and factual. Some agents and even brokerages have quite a reputation but occasionally you have to deal with them in a transaction. I ask for everything to be in writing/email in that case. Some bully-agents are so ridiculous I actually look forward to their calls . . . what will they try next?

As Joe Friday says, "Just the facts".

Jim Dvorovy, REALTOR® Canton Ohio Real Estate (Cutler Real Estate) As someone eluded to earlier, if the agent need the sale because their own finances are in a mess, or they need the commission to pay their own mortgage that emotions sometimes creeps into the deal and really messes it up for all.

Hey Jim - nice to have a "calmer" mate - you can do the "good cop/bad cop" thing lol. We have a broker here in town that you remind me of.  He always moves things forward, making sure the other agent looks good too.  Very respectful and good at his craft.  BTW, I think he has red hair too (or at least used to).  

WEICHERT, REALTORS® - Synergy  How many nails does an agent need to put into the coffin while they present the offer.  Just present it.  Tearing apart a home in a volume of 20 books is overkill. I see this occur all the time with agents that have absolutely no idea on how to negotiate.

Thank you for this great list to follow.  I shall post them in my own words on my website.

I am a fairly new agent and one salesman that has been in the business for many years has a motto, "Sign here and press hard".  I cannot put that motto in my philosophies of real estate.  I feel it is uncaring and motivated by just making a sale.  I am a Texas Hold-em player,( just for fun) and I am finding that poker is a lot like real estate.  You have a poker face, you keep your cards close to your chest, keep your composure, and be a good sport.  Winning isn't all the chips on the table.  Winning is being helpful to your client in guidance and knowledge.  And when they are successful in their transaction, you all become winners.  This may be a little naive, but I see it that way. 

Thanks again and I truly appreciate this information.

Kelly

You are so right! It is hard not to get emotionally involved but it never works out better when you do! Thanks for another great list too!

Jeff Launiere (Keller Williams Tampa Properties) Over the years in real estate, I've had many terminally ill clients.  Some have had strokes, cancer, AIDS...and you can really feel the pressure, but we must still know our limitations.  I find it is a tremendous feeling to close those deals, and satisfaction that we could be of service.  However look at the times we are in now!  This economy is like Haiti.  Everyone has a need, can we help them all/  Can we guarantee a sale for each?  In many ways this is an imposed humility on us, that sooner or later we realize our own limitations.

Pam Lambert (Gateway Real Estate and Appraisals)  Glad you enjoyed.

Suzanne Ellis Realtor® Louisville Kentucky Homes (Semonin Realtors)  Sounds like you are right on track!

Lottie Kendall, SRES -- San Francisco Peninsula (RE/MAX Today, CA DRE#01215160)  I am glad you enjoyed.

Boy....fantastic!! I am always shocked to find agents on a transaction going nuts. I can only assume they desparately need the commission. So not sure if the emotion is for the clients or themselves. Otherwise I would think they would be more in control.

Sara Goss, Realtor, Houston Bay Area, Texas (HatmakerGroup.com GMAC Real Estate)  You mentioned one key factor when I deal with an agent like that.  In the offer, I request "All counters are to be in writing!"  No one needs a tongue lashing with a counter.

I feel respect given usually merits respect earned.  Approach is everything in dealing with people and especially other agents.  I try to foster a feeling of partnership with the other agent by saying things like "I know we can put this deal together!"

Carol Marra CRS e-PRO

CarolMarra.com

 

 

All to true!  Unprofessional and hostile is my experience as well.  You make some solid points and thank you for your list, a good set of standards to work and live by.   Although I have no measurement of this, being professional produces better results.

Alyce Martin in Albuquerque - THE Place To Be! (The Realty Group, LLC)  I think it is the "Good cop / bad cop" thing that works well.  We are both from NY, and I guess we have a no nonsense approach to dealing with life.  In another life I used to run a union in Washington DC, set up lobbying, do arbitration's and negotiations, and do contract negotiations.  There is always so much at stake.  It is also very important to realize "We cannot win them all!"

Kelly Katsus  I like your perspective.  It works!

Brentwood TN Real Estate/Homes - Vanessa Stalets REALTOR® (RE/MAX Elite)  Sometimes, it is very hard to step back, but we must.

Karen Parsons-Fiddler Broker/Realtor (Great Western Realty Group)  I know you are so right.  This is a time where many agents and acquaintances are losing their own homes.  Who are they really stressed out for?

Carol Marra  That is a good way to approach it.

Richard van Seenus (Sotheby's International Realty)  There are agents in this business that are known for being hostile.  You can't negotiate with them while you are being held hostage.  Unlike them, I do not want to be remembered as the "Screamer!"  My thoughts...if the deal is that bad...move on!  "Next!"

Great post! Thank you for the reminders. I work with seniors and it is dificult not to get emotionally involved, but If you get emotionally involved keep it professional!

Derenda Sweeney

 

I couldn't agree more with your post, on the other hand we all have clients who want us to be involved in a transaction emotionally like they are. When we keep our calm they sometimes get regretful about not taking their side! I remind them that it is my job to stay calm and neutral not to lose sight of the big picture to be able to do my job right. We all know that sometimes best deals get lost in the heat of "bad" negotiations as you have suggested. We cannot control the other party but we can  contol ourselves.

I have dealt with one notorious "realtor" in Charlotte who completely refused to share material facts about a house my client was interested in. She insisted that the seller, a bank, permission was required to share the material information. This "realtor" even created a vague loan broker for pre-approval before an offer can be considered by this same bank, which my client did. The subject asset went to pending status 2 weeks later and the vague loan broker never responded to my client. With so many stumbling blocks on my way, at the end of the day, I did not make an offer on the property. It's regrettable how far some "realtors" can go to preserve some assets to friends or relatives!

Outstanding!! Thanks so much for the well-thought-out and expressed post. Going to spend some time with my agents on this one. Can't count the number of times I have said..."we are AGENTS for our clients..not the decision makers."  Well done. You've said it far better than I could!!

It surprises me just how many agents DO seem to get emotionally involved and start making decisions on their clients' behalf, saying things like "that's never going to happen".  Well, if the agent presents something in that way to their client, they are probably right!  We need to remain calm and level headed to serve our clients in the best possible way.

I totally agree with you Jim.  Sometimes our buyers want us to make a low offer -even if we suggest that it could be insulting to the seller.  We are still obligated to present all offers.   I recently held my breath as I made one such offer thinking that the listing agent might bite my head off.  She was courteous and professional.  She said that she would get back to me.  After several back and fourths, we had a deal.  I think agent can sway their client in just how they present such offers.  A hostile agent would have never gotten me a counter offer as they would have gotten their client worked up as well.

 

Jim, I agree with you.  I have seen transactions happened before exactly what you described, sometimes I think some agents taking it too personal, instead of giving facts to help the client and try to work things out , it becomes either their way or no way.  My theory is if you want to stay in business for a long time, work professionally, we are helping our clients to achieve their goal, it is all about communication, not dictatorship.

Hi Jim,   I always li9ke to see some passion on the part of the agents as they fight for the best deal but when it becomes personal things get ugly fast !

Jim...this was once hard for me to separate the personal from the business side of things...sure the personal caring is important, but it takes strength of leadership to get through the mire of business...the personal side eventually gets beat up...Cherise

Great post, and just do your job and quit with the fits!  I always say the exact phrase to buyers agents when they try the pick apart the house negotiation strategy.  Why did the buyer bother if the house is a shambles?  The lastest 'kick' is where the buyers agent writes a letter on behalf of the buyer starting out with 'Mr. Seller, thanks so much for choosing Lyn, and then bashes the price for 5 to 6 paragraphs'.  LOL, I should have posted the last one I got.

Great post Jim,  There is always a fine line between addressing your clients emotional needs and injecting your own emotion driven goals.  As practitioners, especially during a challenging market, we have to respond to negotiations, challenges and opportunities with un-wavering professionalism and remember that we are an advocate for our clients first and foremost.

Jim... This list should be posted above every agent's desk where he/she can read it daily and be reminded of what behavior is necessary to be a professional. Great post - Thanks.

Jim, featured in the Rookie Group. Although I think it should be featured throughout AR!

you are right. Your list is agreat reminder and great advise for new agents to always keep your clients interest first.

Great blog and discussion; you hit the nail on the head!  We need to be a rock for our clients, meaning exactly what you explained- not getting emotionally involved.  I have seen agents ruin a deal for their clients because they acted with hostility toward the other agent.  It is equally frustrating when an agent gets insulted by an offer and threatens to not present it, and attempts to fight with you over it (acting as if it is his/her personal home).  I never give away my client's position, and give simple responses in this case: "Just present the offer." It's funny to see how listing agents may be surprised at their own client's responses!

It is quite easy to do.  My personal mental trick is to go away somewhere.  Go to some of my listings and check up on them.  It clears my mind back to business.  Reacting immediately is one of the biggest mistakes agents make.

The best and highest advantage of using a Realtor is that we are the voice of reason in a sometimes highly emotional happening, (the buying of a home, and the selling of a home) both of which are intensely personal to the parties involved. 

You are so right, Nothing we do should infer that we are personally involved. We, as Realtors, set the standard for our clients experience; we are the ones that our clients depend on for objectivity, for grounding and reason in highly emotional situations, and for interpretation of the complexities of a real estate transaction.   We should take that challenge to heart.

I often say it is our job to take out the emotion. But what i think i really mean is to take out the negative non-productive emotion- you know emotion for emotion's sake.  Positive, affirming emotions are good as long as they too are not extreme either.

Pleasant, factual, and professional is the right demeanor for success no matter who (and what broom they rode in on) you are dealing with! 

 

   

I guess the bottom line is we don't comingle funds, we shouldn't comingle our emotions. Makes sense to me.  I can and do get a little teary eyed when it's over because it is a life changing event, but during the process, I'm a laser.  It's our skills they're hiring.

Union negotiator - YIKES!!! 

Jim,

This is very good advice.  In addition, it is the emotional connection that agents have with their clients that make them great for the purchase and sale transaction and not so good as a short sale negotiator. Letting another individual not connected to the buyer or seller negotiate the short sale is good business sense.

Bank negotiators are ruthless and I find that many agents are less likely to be able to push back hard with an aggressive negotiator. It doesn't make them a bad agent, it makes them a smart agent, because they are so good at managing the client-agent relationship.  It is this relationship that will keep the smart agent in business a lot longer.

Emotion has its place; we need to recognize where that place is.  Great job, Jim

Very good post.  Sometimes this is a ego driven business and people forget it is about our clients.

It's nothing personal.  It's a business transaction.  Oh how many times have I had to remind another agent of that.

Derenda Sweeney, SRES (TEC Real Estate Inc.)  I would still try to avoid the emotions. 

Elchin Kaleli  We must control ourselves and not get caught up in the emotion!  Does a Doctor, or lawyer, or your CPA lose it and jump into your corner yelling and screaming?  How would you regard them if they did?  Would you still view them as professionals?

Kaunda Matoke  In most states a lack of disclosure for being related to a principle in a real estate transaction is a violation of license law.

Exit More Real Estate  That is right, we are not the decision makers.

Martha Kolko (Keller Williams Towne Square Realty)  That is why I tell sellers never reject a bad offer.  Always counter it.  Cooler heads prevail.

Hi Jim,

I guess there is a lot of robots everywhere,the most of them in communistic system.Is this what you are trying to advertise here ? Don't be surprise when one day the computer will take your place.No emotions there.

Zijuzijazijana

It's too bad there isn't an easy way for buyers and sellers to determine ihow well an agent they are considering works with other agents.

Rita Fong (RE/MAX REAL ESTATE TODAY)  Well said.

Bill Gillhespy Fort Myers Beach Realtor (Century 21 Tripower Realty)  I've actually heard other agents cuss the other agent out and call them names.  It does get ugly.

Cherise Selley - Colorado Springs Realtor (Selley Group Real Estate, LLC)   We've all been there.  You are right, we alos close more deals when we stay focused as professionals.

Great Post!!  These hard times can create highly charged emotions on both sides of the transaction. While I've yelled, screamed and jumped up and down in private over a hard transaction; I try hard not to get caught up in someone's else' bad day.   I love Active Rain because of these types of posts.  It makes me realize that I'm not the only one experiencing these situations.  Thank you!

Jim, Great reminder for everybody in the business.  I stress this to all of my newer agents how important it is to keep the professionalism within your transactions.  When you bring in the personal side of life into a transaction it throws the pofessionalism out the window and this is not in the clients best interest.  ~Chris Hochstedt  EXiT Real Estate Partners, DuPage county, Illinois

There've been a few escrows that I allowed myself to become emotional over. One was when some friends were being screwed over by the builder of their home and the other agents resorted to name calling and trying to cajole me to accept the builder's this and that. But it happened too because the buyers and seller went behind the agents' backs and spoke and met and he talked them out of $80K cash so he could go build another house.  He never finished all of the details on their house either and the whole thing was a mess.  I still wont' talk to the other agents and try not to show their properties since i know how they work now with that seller as a constant client. 

I am not sure there it would be possible for me to disagree with the tone and content of this post more than I do.

Hi Jim, Great post.  I've never gone "postal" on an agent but have had agents go nuts on me.  I do get emotional  and I have to conscientiously  remind myself that we are all in this escrow together and investing emotional invovlement is not going to help when navigating through inspeciton reports or the need to extend loan committments, etc.  Your bullet points are the realtor's professional mind set.  Thanks-Lynn

Great advice and content

In as much as it is said about real estate that it is location, location, location we also need to say business, business, business. I have never found it beneficial to be adversarial in a transaction. There is no winner when someone is left dead or speechless on the ground or at the conference table when a deal is complete.

I had a client once say that when he does a deal if he is walking down the street and he sees the buyer & the buyer thinks yeah I might have paid dollar to much and at the same time if he thinks, I could have made a dollar more then he knows it was a good transaction. This is a far better attitude than if I eveer see that person again..... you can fill in the blank.

Thank you for a good post.

Excellent thought.  I've seen agents become emotionally involved on many occasions, and for me, it serves the purpose of making sure I don't have to work with that agent again any time soon!

Thank you Jim for the post. I was just saying the same things to a fellow agent yesterday. My fellow agent had a confrontation with another agent just the day before over what can only be described as an ego out of control. It is just busines not the end of the world if another agent presents a lowball offer. It's called negotiation! Just counter back and see if it's a spaghetti deal or not. Either it sticks together or it doesn't. I do understand when someone purposefully wastes another's time. I have had that happen to me and I got a bit upset, but after counseling my seller that this person didn't really want to be fair by what they were offering I calmed down and so did my seller. We talked it out and countered. It didn't stick and it's part of the business. Our business is to try to get the parties to yes, but from time to time a resounding NO is just fine. It was their choice to present the offer in the fashion that they did and it our choice to say yeah or neah or somestimes something in between. WE HAVE CHOICES! As the commercial goes "Don't get mad, get Glad." Or if that doesn't work get even. Ha!   

Thanks Jim, for a great reminder of what our job is!  It's so easy to get caught up in the moment, especially when working with First Time Buyers! I catch myself thinking of them as "my kids" and sometimes forget that they are free thinking adults! 

I printed out your top 20 list.  Thanks for the reality check!

Lyn Sims ~ Chicago Northwest Suburbs (Schaumburg Illinois ~ RE/MAX Suburban)  I love the letter thing!  LOL!  Thais is so true.  These are the ones that it is great when you get a clean offer for full price, and have to break the bad news to them. 

Great post, with the number of short sales I am working and the roller coaster lives each of the sellers are riding, I would have jumped off the sunshine Skyway bridge long ago if i tried to become emotionally involved.  I can hold their hand, give a hug or just listen, but maintaining distance is a must!

Bob Maiocco (Keller Williams )  Exactly!

Mike Andrews (Colorado Home Finder Realty)  Thanks for some agents with a quick forgetter...Tatoos would also work!

Karen Hurst ~ Principal Broker ~ Warwick ~ Rhode Island (Stonehurst Realty)  Thank you!  You are too kind!

Daniel Seider (Big Trees Real Estate)  I also think older agents get set in their ways and do wrong behavior out of habit.  Sometimes we all need a time out.

Ryan Cha, Broker (RC Edwards Realty Dallas/Fort Worth, Texas)  Years ago, an agent started posturing with us about the price.  We represented the buyer.  We notified our buyer and asked us if was OK to pull his bluff.  We informed him we were pulling the offer.  Within minutes, he got back to us an the seller had accepted our terms 100%! The agent would have killed the deal!

Tim Moncrief (Bartlett Real Estate Group of Keller Williams )  Amen!  "Restraint of tongue and pen!"  No one says we have to respond immediatley!  Exactly! What's the rush?

Deborah & Steve Love (Keller Williams Utah)  Real estate would be a great profession if more persons treated it as such!

Annie Holdreith (Daniel Gale Sotheby's International)  Emotions are OK as long as they are not running us.  I am a firm believer of Intellect over the emotions is what matters.

Alyce Martin in Albuquerque - THE Place To Be! (The Realty Group, LLC)  Alyce, I love the 'comingling' analogy!  We must be a rock!  I feel like soldiers in the field, it is important that we stay coll under fire.  There is nothing wrong with losing it after the deal is done.  We must always stick to the issues at hand. 

PS - It was a good union not an evil one!

I do tend to get vested in the deal with my clients interest at heart!  Great list of things, not to do!

Thank you!  Your ideas are so true.  If we follow through as business and not as emotional beings, we would prevent a lot of the negative energy that is being developed and accumulated. Sending positive vibes to you all, Warren

Would you believe my password to post was "sourberry?"     Wishing sweet berrys to all!

 

Jay M. Johnson (JMJ Consulting Group)  I agree.  I know my own limitations and what we are up against.  I will never do anything to jeopardize my clients.  I cannot practice law, and GA law reaffirms that especailly in a short sale position.

Gene Riemenschneider East Contra Costa Home Sales 01492725 (Area Pro Realty People's Choice) Amen!  It is about them!

Jason Bracht @ Real Living If I ha a nickle for everytime it happened I would be retired by now.

Eva Erdmann (Lion International Inc.)  Thank you!

Sharon Simms St Pete FL - CRS CIPS CLHMS RSPS (ALVA International, Inc.)  Sharon you are so right.  In a normal market where we are not agent saturated like we are now, there was always a better sense of whom we were dealing with because of prior past closed co-op sales.  That is no longer the case in bigger cities.  Each deal can be a baptism of fire!

Helena Kaucheck  - You are not alone!  We are all in this together!

Chris Hochstedt CNC, GRI  I think it is important for brokers to stress this with all their agents.

 

Amy Steele (Coldwell Banker Sky Ridge Realty)  Don't get me wrong.  I am not advocating being a doormat.  If I know exactly where I stand, I've mentioned to other agents - legal actions that could be persued, reporting them to the real estate commission etc.  That does not mean I have lost it.  We need to know we are in the right, we need to understand our roles, the law.  And wehn we do not, I need to see advice bfore running my mouth!

Amy Steele (Coldwell Banker Sky Ridge Realty)  Don't get me wrong.  I am not advocating being a doormat.  If I know exactly where I stand, I've mentioned to other agents - legal actions that could be persued, reporting them to the real estate commission etc.  That does not mean I have lost it.  The way I see it ...We need to know when we are in the right, we need to understand our roles, and the law.  When we do not have all the information and facts before us, we need to see advice before running our mouths!

Amy Steele (Coldwell Banker Sky Ridge Realty)  Don't get me wrong.  I am not advocating being a doormat.  If I know exactly where I stand, I've mentioned to other agents - legal actions that could be persued, reporting them to the real estate commission etc.  That does not mean I have lost it.  The way I see it ...We need to know when we are in the right, we need to understand our roles, and the law.  When we do not have all the information and facts before us, we need to seek advice before running our mouths!

It is much easier to be unemotional if there is some rationality.  Give me some comps when you present your extreme lowball.  If there is a basis in reality, we have a shot.  But I am tired, truly tired, of really lowball offers with no comps or rationale.   Like a bowl of spaghetti thrown against the wall to see what sticks.  Presented with a straight face. 

If and when I present a lowball, I give comps.  Now the agent has something with which to work and discuss with the Seller.   I don't get emotionally involved.  I do get impatient.

It is much easier to be unemotional if there is some rationality.  Give me some comps when you present your extreme lowball.  If there is a basis in reality, we have a shot.  But I am tired, truly tired, of really lowball offers with no comps or rationale.   Like a bowl of spaghetti thrown against the wall to see what sticks.  Presented with a straight face. 

If and when I present a lowball, I give comps.  Now the agent has something with which to work and discuss with the Seller.   I don't get emotionally involved.  I do get impatient.

It is much easier to be unemotional if there is some rationality.  Give me some comps when you present your extreme lowball.  If there is a basis in reality, we have a shot.  But I am tired, truly tired, of really lowball offers with no comps or rationale.   Like a bowl of spaghetti thrown against the wall to see what sticks.  Presented with a straight face. 

If and when I present a lowball, I give comps.  Now the agent has something with which to work and discuss with the Seller.   I don't get emotionally involved.  I do get impatient.

great post Jim... we see this unprofessional behaviour far too frequently... it reflects on all agents and brokers, even the good professional ones... adn it harms the interest of the client in many cases... whether that client be a buyer or a seller...

Agent Aaron @ 512-845-4204 for Kyle TX Buda TX Austin TX Real Estate (StepStone Realty, LLC)  Thank you.

Lynn LeGlaire (Keller Williams)  I have lost it, but for the right reasons.  I cannot stand persons that lie and are underhanded.  There is a major difference in that and losing over a routine deal because we cannot have our own way.  They are planning to steal from you and your client.

Gina Farricielli-Torre - you are more than welcome

Julie Keelan - Keelan Realty Group (Allen Tate Realtors, Triangle  I really like that perspective!

Nicole Donaghy (ERA Wilder Realty)  No one can deny it leaves a bad taste in our mouths!

Christopher Grimm (Windermere Real Estate - NW Inc Ballard)  I really think it is a more common occurrence in our business than we let on.  Since I give out a lot of leads, I am always listening to other agents and hear about their transactions.  It is amazing that many of the same trouble maker agents names come up time after time!

Ronda Densford, REALTOR Jacksonville and Northeast Florida (Magnolia Properties)  When we first moved to the south, and southern agent told me do not patronize the buyers or sellers.  All they want are the facts.

Steven Pahl (Keller Williams Tampa Properties)  That is the best approach.

Bridget Cella, e-Pro Realtor (Re/Max All Pros) To a certain degree, we all do.

Warren Schutt (RE/MAX Unlimited Real Estate)  LOL!  The deals themselves, the loss of equity, the layoffs, and divorces are negative enough.  We do not need to add more stress to the fire!

• Jim: Thanks for the great post and your valuable istructions. If every agent would adhere to your rules, just imagine how much easier our life as agents would be. Thanks once more.

 

Aloha Jim,

Your post is applicable to all sales professions. I've always believed that if you want something at a certain price, ask for it; it doesn't mean you'll get it. On the other side of the coin if someone gives you a low ball offer, oh well, it doesn't mean you have to accept it. Any offer is merely a launching point for negotiation regardless of how low it is. I've always chuckled when a Realtor gets a low ball offer and obstinately refuses to respond to the buyer(which can be a negotiation technique but not in a down market). Life is a never ending negotiation, until you give up or die and when you start taking the negotiation part too personally, your quality of life diminishes as well as your business acumen and success. The greatest expectation is NO expectation, regardless of profession or occasion! I enjoyed your post, mahalo.

Peace,

Margaret Mitchell, York Maine Real Estate (Coldwell Banker Yorke Realty)   The problem I am seeing gin my market is there are no recent comps in many subdivisions.  I always present, and let the seller make the final choice.

Rhode Island Real Estate -- Focus Professionals, Inc.  That is the way I feel also.

Tha's why I always say: "Be open to everything and attached to nothin" Buddha.

http://onemiamiparadise.com

Halina Kraszewski (RE/MAX Suburban) You are welcome!

This is so pertinent.  I just had an offer rejected by an agent who made it appear that I was taking food out of her children's mouths.  I will send her this list - (maybe not).......................chris

Kimo Stowell - Real Estate Merchandiser (JDS Consulting: Hawaii Home Staging and Decor Design)  I love your attitude.  If you never ask, you will never know what the reply will be. 

Marco Peralta - Very true!

Christopher Pataki Newark Delaware Real Estate (Long & Foster Real Estate) - Sometimes it is better to step back for a while.

Love this post. As a listing agent I would always prefer to work with an agent who has a client who loves the property, not one who spends all their energy on picking the place apart. As a buyer's agent I do my best to never insult an agent or seller. If a home is listed too high I just show comps. if my clients are trying to get a deal I just say that the offer is what the property is worth to my client. No need to to make a price a mpral issue.

 

Marcy

It is always good to get information from someone who's feel are firmly planted on the groung. Thank you for the list.

Jim, this is wonderful!  We just had our code of ethics and risk management CE classes and these same topics came up numerous times.  Excellent post!

Marcy Moyer (Intero Real Estate) Comps are the way to go.  Factual references as very persuasive.

Philip Gleason (Baird & Warner) You are more than welcome

Kim Bush - The Neighborhood Expert (Century 21 Brandt Wright Realty)  I try to keep the topics real.

Jim,

Great post!

As a home inspector I often feel he same pain!  I work very hard to give an accurate / factual representation of a homes condition. I try to explain things in simple terms and give my Client a straight forward view of what to expect when they move in.  I have been tought to keep emotions off of the table and avoid emotionally charged questions.  Buying a home is a business decision...and part of the decision will eventually involve "non-business" factors.  First time buyers are always more "emotional" then folks who have moved several times.

I tell my clients to look at Houes and my report objectively and understand that a House ALWAYS sounds worse on paper then it does in person.  The simple question is will this House adequately serve the needs of being my home and is the price right for ME!

If not dont make a crazy offer for a place you dont really want, and don't get into arguements over failed offers. Just let the SELLERS politely reject offers that they dont feel are fair and move on.

Thanks, Jim

We've actually experienced a listing agent's "meltdown".  Not a pretty picture.  We believe her emotional attachment was based on her commission.  Maybe she needs a second job!

Business is business!

Jeffrey Molloy (Check Mark - Westchester Home Inspection)  The secret is to work with adults!  It is very said that some persons just never grow up, and all they want is to have everything their way.  I call it, "Adult daycare!"

Judy Ryab - We had a few of those over the years, but it is their problem not mine.

I was dealing with an agent yesterday that got very uptight when I told her I would be turning in a repair addendum.  Her comment to me was "don't even bother to turn in a repair addendum, my clients will go ballistic".  She hadn't seen the repair addendum and didn't know what we were asking for.  These items needed to be fixed in order for financing to be obtained and were all items the next buyer would also ask for.  Some agents feel they can speak for their clients but need to know that's not their job. 

I totally agree with all your points.  Years ago, I tried to buy a house and our full price offer was never submitted.  The listing agent wanted to buy the house himself.  We finally went directly to the seller to present it ourselves and threatened to turn in the listing agent to have his license revoked!

If only all agent acted as you suggest! We would have such sterling reputations.  Instead many act out of fear of financial insecurity.....

Thanks for your post!

Sandy Mitchell (The Kelly Group, Keller Williams)  Yep!  It is not as if the money is coming out of their pockets.

Kristian Schonberg -  That is not what an agent is supposed to do!  I'm sorry that it happened to you!

Jennifer St.Clair (The Wonder Women Team - San Diego, CA) - Years ago, an agent told us that it is never good to be in real estate when you are starving for your next deal.  Others can always sense your desperation.  I believe that was really good advice.

Jim.. You make some excellent points.. and all very true.  It is a fine line between being professional, and working with your client and getting their trust.  There are times when being emotionally involved (to a point) is helpful.  But it could bite you in the butt.

The art of a real estate relationship can be quite challenging.  We are counseled to develop relationships so that we can foster referrals, yet we must remain professional and not emotional about the transaction.  So let me get this straight, I want to know when your birthday is, I send your kids graduation cards, and I might even get invited to a client Christmas party but I'm not supposed to "care" about the transaction.  I get the logic.  And for the most part I agree.  I don't yell, I don't cry when deals fall apart, but I do "care" and that's what makes me a great agent.  I care enough to make sure the client clearly understands the deal, the specifics of the home, the pros and the cons.  I care enough to represent the client in the most professional manner possible, and I care enough for myself, the client and the other parties involved to do my best to make the deal happen.

I agree with your top 20, I just wanna make sure we don't pull out all the emotion.  That's what makes us human.

Jim... great post! A great way to learn how to deal with not becoming emotional when presenting offers and counter offers is to watch the sports coaches of different games. They're either winning or losing, but always in control of their emotions. If they're winning they know it. If they're losing there's nothing they can do and losing their cool will not solve anything. My dad used to say "if you're right, don't argue, and if you're wrong don't argue."  Anyway, good deal!

You have excellent points about how your emotions, and their improper display can ruin a negotiation.  Phil Marcus new book Zen and the Art of Negotiating has chapters dealing with your primary points giving you excellent tools on how to deal with the problems of improper emotions and how to deal with your own client.

Your list of do's and dont's has the same points as my Principles, Rules, Tools and Techniques in my book Create A Great Deal, the Art of Real Estate Negotiating. For example, one of my principles is "No Hostile Emotions".  Realtors can act as a shock absorber, by not passing along your client's emotional outbursts that could antagonize the other party. 

The National Association of Realtors statistics show that our clients expect high levels of negotiating skill from their Realtors.  Phil's book can help you deal with using the wisdom of Zen to be much bettter in a negotiating situation.  My book will give you the specific tools to make everyone succeed in the process.

Thank you for your thoughts.

A real estate deal should be good for all parties, someone has something they need to sell, someone would like to buy it. Each agent, the loan officer, appraiser, inspectors and attorney are working for a living.

Nobody gets what they need if we do not work together and get the deal done.

Thanks for a great post. You make great points about emotional involvement. It is a little easier here in North Carolina because by law we are required to present all offers. Also, the buyers agent has the right to be present when the offer is presented. They obviously are not allowed to be involved when the listing agent and the seller talk about the offer, but they have the right to be present to make sure the offer is presented as written. I think the way I can best describe how we can prevent ourselves from getting to involved emotionally is as follows: we need to walk in the client's shoes to understand them, but not walk so long as to get athelet's foot.

Excellent post!  I definatly tune out when another agent starts to yell at me...  If you have something that you want conveyed to my sellers write it down and I will give it to them...  but PLEASE don't yell at me...

Valerie Osterhoudt, ABR ~ Cromwell, CT Real Estate ~ 860.883.8889 (Johnson Real Estate, Inc.)  Personally, I beleive too many do not even know the line exists!

Amy Reed (Allison James Estates & Homes)  I never said I did not care.  I show it by being my professional best.

jerry dragoon (select properties of south Florida), lake worth,  Thanks Jerry!

Tim Burrell (RE/MAX)  It is funny that you mentioned negotiations.  I wonder how many in real estate ever took a college course in contract negotiations?  I would bet there are very few that have any formal training in negotiating a contract.  There are also college course that teach cultural negotiations and the differences in how some cultures will negotiate a deal.

Alan Grizzle (Chestatee Real Estate)  Yet some are only interested in how it turns out for them.

Tom Bailey (Realty World First Coast Realty)  I like that!

Shanna Hall, GRI (Real Estate Solutions)  I totally agree!

Good Post!!  So true, so true, so true.  I truly believe we as Realtors need a reminder every now and then, especially when you do live in a community where "everybody does know your name"!!  Thanks for the post.

I have mixed emotions about your post (grinning). Although I aggree with your post in gerneral, I do not agree with removing the emotions. You have spent many hours with you client and I personally am emotionally involved with them. I think it should be more along the lines of being respeatful and professional with your inter-actions. I think being respectful while trying to be an avocate for your clients is the issue more than being emotional.

Jim, I guess we all have had these experiences. At the time I had 19 years in this business. When I was with the REMAX I was personally buying a 4 plex. The listing agent was in my office. I represented my self. My offer was about 5k less than asking. No other concession except for keys, files and tenant deposits. When I presented the offer the listing agent in the office said "My seller would be stupid to except this offer". I said cut the crap and give them a call. So she picks up the phone and said If I was you I would not accept this, we closed in 40 days. Long and short I told everyone even the broker of the treatment and posture. That agent is still in business but I hear she just survives in addition I have never shown one of her listings.

Bottom line is to never walk in anybody shoes but your own. I tell my agents this everyday. BTW the seller of that property was glad to sell the property due to his terminal illness. He past away about 6 months later.

Mary Pettenon - It is critical to guard our reputations in business.

Dianne Hicks (Tarbell, Realtors)   The moment you become emotionally involved, your objectivity and the service you offer will be diminished.  I said earlier, I care very much for my clients and their needs, but it cannot cloud the facts.  I cannot accept offers for them, I cannot make an offer in this market a better offer.  When I try to play God, the world will start to unravel around me.

Frank Rubi Kenner | Metairie |LA | Real Estate (Frank Rubi Real Estate | Licensed in Louisiana)  I had a similar deal years ago.  100K less in offer price, but cash paid extras on the side.  The agent went postal, cursed, swore, and called us every names in the book!  The builder came in and accepted it. He had no problem at all with paying the upgrade options on the side. Cash is cash! The agent wanted the commission on the extra 100K in options.  The builder then fired her after seeing her in action.

Long ago, I decided that I wasn't going to get emotionally involved in any R.E. transaction!  I do my job, present things accurately, and make a great effort to get to the settlement table with all egos intact!

KATHY OPATKA Ocean City, MD Re/Max Premier Properties (Re/Max Premier Properties)  I think that is the way it should be.

Hi Jim,

Great post and one that we should re-read on a regular basis.  Due to the current economic climate, divorce etc we must always remember what our role and goals are to sell our clients home with professionalism

I've seen agents take low offers so personally - just what an overpriced Seller in this market doesn't need!   Good Post.  Thank you for the list.

Roshan Quigley (Weichert Realtors - Manalapan/Marlboro, NJ)  I totally agree.

Beverly Femia - Serving the Greater Wilmington, NC Coastal Area (Century 21 Sweyer & Associates)  I think what bothers me a lot is when a good offer is rejected by an agent.

Jim, sorry I missed this when you first got a feature, been really busy in the business the last few weeks.

I had to laugh at your title because there are so many times I leave a listing appointment and am just numb or in tears.

The sellers have lost every penny they put into it and are upside down.

Now to YOUR topic:

Agents get a reputation and I know and you know that if 2 offers come in the agent is going to want to work with the agents that advocates for their client, but is not a school yard bully.

Missy Caulk-Ann Arbor- Realtor(R)- Ann Arbor Real Estate (Keller Williams-Ann Arbor)  Missy I totally agree.  I wonder how many buyers lost a low offer bid becuase their agent was a bully, a jerk or was throwing a tantrum bcause they do not know how to conduct business.

Great tips Jim.  Your so right about agents getting all emotional about a deal.  Even if there are small problems to iron out, some agents can be very rude. 

Great tips Jim.  Your so right about agents getting all emotional about a deal.  Even if there are small problems to iron out, some agents can be very rude.

Jim: I totally agree with you on your points, although I must confess to actually shedding a few tears when I got a short sale (from Hell) approved for my Seller yesterday, after working relentlessly on it for almost seven months (it was with Wells Fargo...)

It's hard not to get involved with your Clients, as far as your heart goes, but must always maintain the professionalism and objectivity when it comes to the deal.

Now featured on the Optimist Group.

Jim,

Thank you for the great reminders! Being in small community, sometimes it is difficult for agents in our area not to become personally involved. since we are pretty tight knit here. Everyone seems to be a friend or relative of someone close to the agents involved. So, it's nice to be reminded, and I will remind those I work with that business is business...keep our feelings out of it.

Thanks again!

Tony Anderson it is sad because it avoidable.

TONY ANDERSON Realtor® Demorest Clarkesville Lula Cleveland Homer Alto (Century 21 Community Realty In Northeast Georgia)  In my marketplace there are several agents that no one want to work with because of that.

Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Real Estate Connection God bless you for hanging in that long and assisting your client!  Wow!  I actually understand that.  We had many situations over the years where we gave our all to get the deal done.  AIDS, strokes, cancer, job loss and imminent foreclosure...

Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Real Estate Connection  Thanks for the feature!

Elise Lindberg (Four-U Realty Inc)  Elise, I think in a small community it is more important than ever to watch the way business conducted.

I often tell the other agent 'Do you own your house?'  We'll I have a house too.  It's the buyer who doesn't have a house.  He should be more upset than you & I that this is not working...

Jim,

Thanks for the great points and the reminder that we are consultants.  We need to act and present with biases aside and to only state the facts.  Human nature being just that we tend to frequently blur the line.  I guess that's why there are so many real estate practitioners.  Hopefully, we strive to get it right more often, than not!

Thanks again!

Dave Miller - Really!  That is how they act!

Eugene Adan, N. San Diego County Homes, Adan Properties  Most agents I know are very committed.  It is the few bad apples that spoil the barrel!

Jim - You covered all the bases here.  I  know of certain agents in my local area who's names make me cringe when I see their name on a listing or know they are going to be showing one of mine.

Carol Culkin (Houlihan Lawrence Realty)  Happens here in GA too!

Thanks Jim for your list of what's needed in this business. Professionalism must always be first and foremost when dealing with the public and with other colleagues. If we as Realtors practice these principles daily, the public for one will look at us through different lenses. Other professionals in the Real Estate Industry will also hod us in high esteem. What goes around comes around.

Jeff Stone (Century21 Laffey Associates)  Jeff your line..."What goes around comes around."  It's right on the money.

could you see to it that all the  bad agents get a copy of this...

Leave emotions out of it. Mnay times in this business you need a thick skin.

Great reminder, Jim. It may sometimes be because they made a mistake in some way & are being defensive. The last 2 times I had this happen was once when a buyer's agent made a mistake & didn't get something in writing that would have protected her buyer, and it came back to haunt her after closing when her buyers got upset with her. She goofed, then got mad at the sellers & me.

The most recent was a listing agent who said that her seller didn't have the money to make any inspection repairs. So, she paid for them herself. She also got her dad to make an appraisal repair because she would have had to pay someone to do it. He did not do it correctly, and the appraiser had to come back out 4 times at a cost of the $100 final inspection fee each time. (Either her, or her seller got stuck with that $400 - not my buyer!). She was very emotional & got upset with the buyers & the appraiser when they were actually being reasonable. She had the emotions of a seller, unfortunately. She should have advised us (& her client) up front that it would be sold as-is, and not sold to an FHA buyer. She also opened herself up to a lot of liability doing it this way. By the way, she asked me if I would cut my commission to help pay for some of the costs. I said no, of course.

Dana Devine (Charles Rutenberg Realty)  If I could hand deliver it personally to them I would!

Tigard Oregon Homes for Sale>> Wayne B. Pruner, GRI (Oregon First)  I totally agree!

Stacey Johnson-Cosby (Reece & Nichols Realtors)  When an agent lists a home that is upside down they know from the the beginning they are in over their heads.  It is their problem, not yours or your buyers!  That agent is a user!

Thanks Jim, Home Inspection are not pass or fail they are part of the process and are what they are a home inspection. We have a move in certified home inspection program that will take some of the emotions out of the transacton. http://activerain.com/blogsview/1554084/homes-pre-inspected-and-ready

Fred Sweezer Sr. (Property Inspection Services)  Sounds like a good idea to me.